Shanna Geezy

Just another confused little American girl… Rambling my way through the thoughts and the days.

My Fellow Giants Fans. October 31, 2010

Filed under: Clothes,Friends,Health,Sports — shannageezyro @ 9:55 pm

I remember when I was a little  girl my Uncle Bruce was obsessed with the Giants. He used to take my brother and I to games with our little mitts and we would try to catch foul balls. That was when Jose was the Uribe we were chanting for. I remember the 1989 World Series and the earthquake that all the adults around me were really concerned about. I vividly remember in 2002 being in college and being supremely annoyed that a team from Southern California beat us. Norcal forever! But this year now that the boyf has made me a hardcore spots fan I’m fascinated, and a little inspired that in the midst of all the crap that goes on around us it seems like or little part of the world is unified around this little group of castoffs and misfits that to me seem to be making a little bit of magic. I sincerely hope they win but even if they don’t we should not forget how they made us all friends and fellow fans for these briefs weeks in the fall. There’s lots of people who claim to be original giants fans who slam band wagoners for jumping on the train after we started performing in the post-season… A fan is a fan were all hoping for the same outcome .

Josh and I were lucky enough to attend Game 1 of the NLDS. It was an awesome experience but I have to say sitting in my living room with a group of friends, laughing, screaming, and cheering for at at those boys has been my favorite part of the fall. It’s something I’ll miss when we have a new group of World Series Champions. Here’s a look at my collection of T-shirts celebrating the Giants! Happy Halloween everyone!

 

Romanbowubbleard House Tour October 25, 2010

Filed under: Help,House,Love — shannageezyro @ 9:38 pm

Since most of my house is clean and I am procrastinating yet another paper I decided to do a quick photo shoot. The pics turned out ok but they’re from my iphone so forgive me.

Also I have no idea why the order I keep putting them in keeps changing… I will mess with it later.

 

Just an Update October 18, 2010

Filed under: House,Love,Trouble? — shannageezyro @ 10:07 pm

Timmy our faithfully loud tortoise has been donated to Josh’s nephew. I do miss him and wish him well in his new home. I plan to double my lobbying efforts for one of these. It’s half french bulldog half Boston terrier. I can’t be pet-less.

 

Never let go of hope….

Filed under: Love,Past... — shannageezyro @ 10:02 pm

“Never let go of hope. One day you will see that it all has finally come together. What you have always wished for has finally come to be. You will look back and laugh at what has passed and you will ask yourself… ‘How did I get through all of that?”

This is a photo my Dad snuck of me while I was waiting for my friends on the day of my college graduation. See the cell phone in my hand, complete with the antenna up. 🙂 I’ve been struggling the last couple months with a feeling of unknown. I found this picture the other day and remembered how much hope I felt this day. So much has happened since this moment and I’ve grown up so much in the 5 years since I’ve graduated but in a lot of ways I feel like this person wanted more from me. Would she look at me and think I’ve wasted these years?

 

“One day at a time–this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful it will be worth remembering.”

It feels like all the days of the same kind just keep chasing each other through the years. I hate this feeling of lost. I really just try to stay in each moment and not get overwhelmed by the millions that follow me around and beckon me from around the next bend but it’s hard to not get caught up in them all. Mistakes and dreams keep swirling around in my head making me doubt. Making me question.

 

Learning to fly… But I ain’t got Wings October 13, 2010

Filed under: Health,Help,Love,wish — shannageezyro @ 4:41 am

I’ve been totally stuck on this song as it’s been redone by Lady Antebellum. I managed to find it on iTunes and I am currently listening to it on repeat. This happens when I get all turned around and twisted in my thoughts like I have been lately. I have a confession guys (all like 3 of you who read this) I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I’M DOING! I have this overwhelming urge to get in my car and drive far far away. But I know undoubtedly as soon as I got to my unknown destination I would be paralyzed with loneliness. I have this awful ambivalence towards my life  lately. I think back and wonder where I went? Or where did the person I thought I was go? I just don’t know how I got so lost. I mean I’m all about the road less traveled, I just wonder how  I got so far away from where I thought I was headed. And I’m so scared, but of what I have no idea. This is all just a big ramble, the kind of ramble a song that touches my heart makes come out. I used to spend alot of nights like this… In a dark room with some good music letting whatever needed to come out come out. I missed it and at the same time was glad I didn’t have to do it anymore. I’m still stuck on the road trying to figure this crap out.

Part of me knows how far I’ve come, the other part wants to know when I’m gonna get there. Most of me knows that it’s never about reaching a destination, it’s about the journey. About making everyday an experience and finding happiness in it. This I know is sometimes harder than others. But it is possible even in the darkest times to find some light to cling to. It’s been worse is what I tell myself. But I have this panic that rises in me… A little voice that wonders if it’s always going to be a question or if I’ll let go and stop trying to find the answers. Does it matter what I’m doing, where I’m going, how I get there?  The older I get the more I think no. But when will I stop trying and tormenting myself? I keep looking and searching…