I’ve mentioned the boyf before. And how very much I love him. He is my everything and I truly am the luckiest girl in Nor Cal for having him in my life. He is one of the most generous people I know. Loyal to a fault, he would do anything for one of his friends and of course anything for me… He is my bestest friend and genuinely a good good person. Before I met him I had quite a few failed relationships because I thought I could change an ass hole into a good guy or I tried so hard to make something out of nothing it would implode in my face and leave me looking like a psycho cause really ladies, a few dates does not make a relationship. And as much as we hate to admit it’s true…. Sometimes if you give the milk away for free they really had no intention of ever buying the cow and will keep drinking until you have the guts to stand up for yourself and take what you deserve. I had my heart broken a couple times and learned that it’s not something you give easily and freely to everyone you meet, relationships are about giving what you get. This reciprocation can mean sometimes you’re giving everything you’ve got and other times you’re simply filling up space and having fun. My method was to keep a bunch of eggs (boys) in a bunch of different baskets and not get too attached to them. If one of them broke or disappeared I had another one. (This makes me sound kinda slutty but it wasn’t like that.)
Before I met the boyf I had made a general shift in my approach to dating. Whatever I got I was going to give back and just have fun… If the guy was an ass hole well, I’d be a bitch. If he was nice but lazy I’d be nice but lazy. And if someone gave it their all I would too, but not too much too soon. I didn’t want to be the only one falling in love. However long it lasted I was going to make the most of it and if for some reason it wasn’t fun anymore I’d find another dude… There’s plenty of fish in the sea and life is too short to deal with someone who isn’t going to give you what you want or need.
I’d met guys at bars, guys at work, guys at school, guys through friends. In my opinion you could meet someone anywhere. Most people don’t know this but I met the boyf online. I know in my personal online dating experience the majority of the men I dated were a little on the odd side. I didn’t expect to ever meet anyone like the boyf. Especially since the site I met him on I hardly ever interacted with except to take online quizzes (kinda like the ones in Cosmo). When we first started corresponding he was in Greece with his best friend and actually answered and email telling me he was out of the country. I thought this was a little lame I mean what kind of guy bothers to respond to an email from a girl he’s never met. But that’s just the kind of guy the boyf is… Courteous and loving, polite and wonderful!
When he got back from Greece we tried to set up a date… He tried to squeeze me in. It was something along the lines of “I’m meeting some friends for drinks in the Lower Haight but we could grab dinner before.” My response was polite but assertive. I told him to give me a call or a text when he had some more time. I didn’t want to be an inconvenience but I wasn’t going to start the trend of being a second priority. I deserved an evening without having to fit into his schedule. It’s totally something we all do to people but I would rather not go on a date than be fit into a little time slot.If you consent to this kind of thing right off the bat you’ll always be put in this position and trust me it gets frustrating. Ask for what you want and you’ll either get it or not. If not it just means he’s not the right guy. The right person will want to give you everything you need.
Well the boyf responded accordingly, he immediately set up a dedicated night for us to have dinner. He even made reservations and insisted on picking me up. (He almost killed me on the way to the restaurant) but we made it and I can honestly say it was the best first date I’ve ever been on. It was like I had known him forever. I barely ate my dinner cause we were talking so much. He was funny, sweet, cute, and had the sexiest blue eyes I’d ever seen. I still get lost in those puppies. I knew I was in trouble. I had a bunch of eggs in other baskets but suddenly the only egg I cared about was the boyf. It turns out I had nothing to worry about.
Our relationship progressed without any drama or questions that usually plague the beginning stages. I didn’t stress if he was going to call every five minutes, cause he did. It was so easy and one night at a Giants game he introduced me as his girlfriend. And I was . A few months later he asked me to move in with him. And I did. I can talk to him about anything and everything and he is always there to support me. They say when you meet the right one you just know and there aren’t any questions, only answers. Well in my experience this is true… I love the boyf for helping me find them all.